Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
Hey when I die alone will you come by often enough so that my cats don’t eat my face?
I swear to God, I saw my life flash between my legs.
I'm eating my dinosaur chicken nuggets in the order they would die in the food chain.
you convinced the bartender to un-cut you off by letting him touch your boobs whenever you ordered a drink.
Why have they been driving around the block for the past 30 min?
He told her it was international road head day.
You are such a cockblock sometimes
You NEED a cockblock sometimes
at what point last night did i decided to have a photo shoot with your camel toe
I gave up. I'm crying over my notes. Oh, ya know, just another drunk finals week
You look cute and you are awesome. And that means something coming from a judgmental bitch
i need to put some appletini on your dick
You licked my eyeball, you are officially cut off. If you just missed you can have a second chance on Friday.
Please don't finger me like a jackhammer. I'm a woman not a construction site.
Did u guys seriously make a betting pool on when im going to get pregnant???
Yep, wanna bid?
Worst sex ever! He was a talker for sure! I was on top and out of no where he said "Oh you bad bitch?" I stopped and left.
Randomize
