now i know why they say having sex with her is the equivalent to licking a pay phone
this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
just found the deal breaker
hairy back?
he can't live within 1000 ft of a school
the girl i fucked last night woke up this morning, disoriented and looked at me, and said "oh, you're hot." and went back to sleep.
All I remember about walking back home was that I maced my shadow.
I gave you a 45 minute blowjob. You were inside me for 3 minutes. I'm going to need you to get your shit together.
New rule : you aren't allowed anything . Ever .
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
Did I get stoned on a sunday afternoon and speak to someone on the phone for an hour about cats and their behaviour? Glad you asked. And yes.
I wanna send them a card but I don't think hallmark makes a "sorry your fiance and another girl blew me at the same time in a frat house but congrats!" card
I would go a lot of places to get laid. But I would NOT go to Staten Island.
Guess who's the proud owner of her very own foxtail butt plug!!
One day soon I'll learn the difference between a good high and way too high. Today is not the day.
Uhmm, it's called hentai.
I DON'T CARE WHAT IT'S CALLED I DON'T WANT TO SEE IT ON MY WORK COMPUTER
I need you to know I’m weirdly very sexually attracted to Charlie Puth now
Randomize
