We should go out drinking together soon
I'm still not going to have sex with you
My moms helping me unpack but im getting a little nervous because I dont remember where i put my dildo
What did you even date her?
because emotionally unstable girls are great in bed.
I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
theres a difference between trying to make someone happy and letting them fuck you in the ass
Waking and baking has revolutionized how i brush my teeth. Seriously up to like 25 min everry morn. Highly recommend
She said to bring taco sauce. Hoping that's a euphemism.
literally hosing herself off in my back yard with the hose. i offered her the shower but she refused. that drunk.
he said he wished i had balls so he could kick me in them. then we had sex obviously
You told the cashier at McDonald's not to smell the ones cause you had just got back from the strip club. Good deed.
and then you called me a third time and yelled that you were stealing a puppy named Willow
Literally told everyone you're my idol cause you ate a chicken nugget off a sword
Somewhere on my work laptop I have a map visualizing all the area codes that Ludacris has ho's
I hope that wasn't done on billed time
I can guarantee that it was
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
My last Google search was 'can an impotent man have sex'. I don't even want to know what I did with that guy.
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