I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
Hello wreck, this is your train calling.
I NEED TO NOT REMEMBER THIS IN THE MORNING. He is our TEACHER.
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
What a dumb baby whore.
We where late for the party because we spent the last hour staring at a towl becase we thought it was a raccoon
Found a girl that was gonna make out with 25 people for her 25th birthday. I was like #12. Made top half!
Yes. Amanda is the only option and I want cake so I can sacrifice my vagina.
No shame December is a go.
Totally just drove past you riding your bike. I was like damn, that looks like a cute little hipster boy, and then I realized it was you and that I'd already banged you and it kinda made my day. I hope you're well. Come over soon?
Just ate an entire BBQ chicken pizza this better go to my tits
Drug test isn't today. Now I'm just sitting in this orientation with a bag of your piss in my pants
So now I have had sex with 2 people my son graduated high school with.
Sorry about you walking in on the whole nude kinect dancing. The new roomie was drunk and naked and told us he was either over dressed or we were under dressed for the party. And Amy figured it would be easier to join him than it would be to dress him
Nothing quite like spending your evening singing Shania Twain I Feel Like a Woman barbershop quartet Style with some homeless guys outside of Keyport liquor. love Shania Twain. How's your Sunday?
At this point, I would not mind getting hit by a truck. It would mean I could get this over with quicker.
Randomize
