I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
I'm gonna stay in bed all day and watch porn in an attempt to stay warm.
my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
Im embracing the luau theme and maybe bringing a kiddie pool filled with alcohol. Im also embracing the high probability I will not remember this night.
Drunk on Tuesday. Double fisting. Mmmbop is playing. Only girl in the group. Life is complete.
and then you looked me right in the eyes and said "i just really wanna pet some horses right now"
Seriously. Texted me 4 times and that didn't wake me up so he nicely called and left a voicemail saying he WOULD call me 8 times. So when he called back I answered.
Amanda bynes is my spirit animal
By early evening I was shouting at the deeply Christian girl to suck my dick inbetween snorting lines of gatorade powder.
He realized that I was watching deadliest catch while we were jerkin off on FaceTime.
Yeah I was thinking something along the lines of "I almost died, lets celebrate with sex. Come over"
just had sex in my dorm hall public bathroom while wearing my favorite cat sweater. tonight was a win
You're now part of the minority of friends who haven't seen my boobs.
idk what the male equivelent of vajazzling is but it better be worth the time
Sorry I can't pick up... thought process is fine but too stoned to form words.
Randomize
