i threw up in a trash can last night at kellys irish times. but in a trash can because i'm a lady
So my grandma sent me a doily for my birthday - don't ask why, I don't know. Anyways I put my bong on it, I think it actually classed up the joint.
Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
if he only knew that in between each sext i was puking.
Its like fucking yourself in the head with a weed strapon
she trying to cartwheel up the stairs... not going so well
REALLY should have cleaned under my bed before I had my parents come help me pack...things my parents just found: several condoms and a bottle of lube. My mom when she found a condom: "ooo ribbed. Laura's a lucky girl"
Bud light lime after 12 shots of vladdy is like frolickin in a meadow of sweet flavor
I just tried on my "outfit" for tonight and I should just wear sweatpants and a sign on my face that says I like it in the ass. That would be more comfortable
The only people in the library at 5:00 on the friday after finals are homeless or pre-med.
You tried to bite my nipple like 3 times
NAh son
Just general bites
You know if we weren't hooking up I think we'd actually be friends
Uhmm, it's called hentai.
I DON'T CARE WHAT IT'S CALLED I DON'T WANT TO SEE IT ON MY WORK COMPUTER
When you start lapping your martini like a cat it's time to go home. Partys over.
Watching a guy pay his tab with a check. Jesus dude...
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