Its not alright that i make out with a manican.
Today let's steal peoples pets out of their backyards and leave ransom notes
I don't even have to turn the heat on in my car. Just fart the whole way home.
I kept feeling my boobs..just to make sure they were still there.
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
The guy I wanted to make out with just got beat up, let's roll.
Just used my boobs as a ramp to guide ramen into my mouth.
Oh my god. I just realized something amazing. If I get pregnant with a boy, that technically means I have a penis right??????
Let me know when ur ready so I can throw up one last time then brush my teeth
He's moaning and crying and coughing up something audibly liquid. I can't live in this house any more.
Any day that has a special name thats capitalized means you need to need to call in sick and get day drunk. That's why they are there.
2 hours later, she made her cat watch the waterfall scene from Homeward Bound to teach her how good she has it here.
I don't want to be Eskimo brothers with your dad
As long as you keep bringing fries home, i'll keep being naked when you get home
did i tell you guys i finally 69’d for the first time last night? just thought the group chat should know.
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