I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
the semester is winding down: time to procrastinate by googling cheap keg options
There are two people having sex in one of the showers right now trying to silence their orgasm sounds and failing. Thank you coed bathrooms.
he just payed for our date, after telling him I was leaving early to meet my fuck buddy. is there something lower than friendzone I can stick this guy in?
it was just fiscally responsible to stop going to strip clubs where the strippers recognized me
The only word I understood in that whole setence was semen.
Who topped off the "random beer mix" beer bong with a pinch of pepper?? All you could taste was busch and pepper...
No it was the best sex I've had in months. Nothing turns me on more than getting rid of a boyfriend.
In this town being related to a brewing family or the owner of a sports team is like being royalty. It's like hooking up with the queen's nephew or something.
And really all I wanted was to be like "hey can I borrow your dick for a few hours this weekend?"
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
Jesus, I just want to drink. Also simultaneously punch things and rub my vagina on them.
holy fucking shit get me out of here. even the babies are wearing beanies
That broad from the bar put her name in my phone as "The girl I'm going to marry in 10 years".
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
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