Seeya bye Latvian government! Whammy!
whoa...plan B gets you drunker quicker.
he looked about as manly as a guy in a volkswagen bug can look
Last night I got a napkin with 4 names & numbers: Katie, Ellen, Kylie...and Brandon.
I didn't realize how much I missed him until his balls were back in my mouth..
wait a second. did i just remember you the other night referring to your tits as tia and tamara.....
She tried to lure me back to her house by saying she had "real" pizza.
do you think theyll let us bring mariachis to the strip club?
The trashcan full of everclear punch caught on fire...you should probably come home now.
I just rolled an Obama blunt and a Romney shame joint for tonight. Vote wisely.
If you think for one second that I would forget Mardi Gras, you clearly don't know how much I love boobs.
I danced with this guy last night, I left like I was humped by a blind baby kangaroo trying to body-box.
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
it'll be like a game of Russian Roulette, but with my vagina.
Give me the sexing that I truly desire and I will reveal to you the mysterious location of the PBR's
Randomize
