unlike you, ive never imagined darth vader masturbating
I don't know if its because i'm stoned or what but painting my kitchen yellow makes it look crooked
Peanut butter balls.
IF YOU EVEN COME NEAR MY BALLS AGAIN I SWEAR TO GOD
Is it bad that i wanna bang this girl ONLY because she looks like my cousin?
It's a journey
And the destination is his penis?
Precisely.
I had to run home with my hands covering my tits this morning. How does this keep happening?
THERE ARE SO MANY ALCOHOLS IN MY BLOOD RIGHT NOW
This girl is wasted dancing to The Final Countdown. She's grinding on a guy who came to the bar in a track jacket and a wife beater
My boss doesn't know what jello shots are. I've lost faith in this company.
I think my teeth are moving, they feel like people.
just had an acid flashback in my therapist's office. i am a walking stereotype
It’s like my vagina just knows when a man is a barrel-chested freedom fighter.
I would accept a super bowl ring as an engagement ring
Angels sing when his face is between my thighs. I came 3 times before he even came up for air.
I ate cake in bed. Felt great
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