We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
he wanted to give me a nickname... my choices were superjugs,godzilla boobs or mouth of fury
Have you ever noticed how boring internet porn is after you cum? I can't shut my computer fast enough.
the girl sitting next to me in class is using her birth control box as a ruler
I wonder if i passed any courses from last semester
Im deleting that text because its a possible ncaa violation
You're right. Single life welcomed me back with open arms. It's like it knew it wasnt going to be long when I left.
I wanna give a stern lecture to whoever invented pants cause they are hard right now
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
Dude I'm about to just roll over and piss off the side of my bed, rather than make the conscious effort to get up and walk to the bathroom. One of those hangovers.
Maybe if I get to know him I'll stop wanting to fuck his wife so much.
Don't let me publish my memoir unless "hurt my ankle drunk irish dancing" is at least the title of a chapter because that is really the whole story of my life.
I just fell in love with a beard, the guy it's attached to isn't great but I think I'm going to take one for the team
I called 911 when they kicked me out of the bar last night.
Randomize