So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
I am pretty sure he just licked my hand while trying to sing goo goo dolls iris to me. Get me out of this state.
We couldn't find any ping pong balls, so we used a fishing bobber. Could we be more country?
words cant express how excited I am to make January 1st our own personal version of The Hangover
Friend date it is then. Question: Can friends engage in sexual activities after dates?
How was that my fault?! I made you breakfast and gave you cake, as you asked. Then, you initiated sexual activity.
my vagina is starting to think like a penis, and I'm not even slightly worried
You can laugh all you want but 99 grapes is a lot stronger than what you were drinking.
Just scratched my head and I basically rained glitter.
Apparently mid making out I got up and said "I need to figure out my life" went in the bathroom and threw up for two hours.
Like I don't care that he's a drug dealer, but I have a problem with his inefficient and ineffective business model.
In honor of the new administration, I'm going to make it my goal this weekend to get some lesbian action. Fuck Donald Trump and fuck Mike Pence. I'm going to be a spiteful gay.
I just put on my bra while peeing. I fear this will be my big achievement of the day.
Are you sure you found YOUR underwear?
Upstairs definitely just had sex while I wrote you love poetry. That was a fun experience 🤷🏻♀️
I have a number of responses, ranging in content, tone, and maturity. Choose your destiny...
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