i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
Lemme guess, I was the one completely shit faced making out with the 50 year old...
LOL, wrong number bro. Good luck trying to figure out what happened though..
Yes and yes. Got taken to a Florida strip club. I desperately want to flood my eyes and ears with hand sanitizer right now.
Was the first guy that bit your neck last night wearing a trenchcoat...I have a vague memory.
All those movies are bullshit, there is no way to run down a line of parked cars, they`re too far apart. my faces hurts so much right now
I think I'd be more bothered by his cross dressing if I wasn't secretly into women..,
I haven't been that free with the boobs since I was 19. I'm putting them away for a while.
If you insist
The one guy literally flopped my boob out. Yes I insist.
Is it bad that I have more guilt over drunk eating Doritos than hooking up with my ex's best friend last night?
dude, I felt like being high in a Santa hat and eating five boxes of cookies was right for today.
I already plan to donate my brain to science so they can attempt to fully understand the complexities of my existence
His exact words: "I don't have anything you can't treat with antibiotics."
Btw. I have a sinus infection from doing cocaine in a portapotty at a Duran Duran concert. So, gimme a couple of days before y'all start the party.
I'm not sure if I should pay him or he should pay me, but someone should get paid for the sex I had this morning.
I had no plans to sleep with him, but he had to stay because of the snow. I always say, don't look a gift storm in the mouth.
If she didn't have scissors in her hand I would have motor boated the fuck out of her when she was done cutting my hair.
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