it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
told my boyfriend i was a virgin so he wouldnt feel bad since he is. now hes asking why his dick is so itchy. should i tell him why?
i don't see why you should, it's not like you told the other guys with the itchy dicks.
I am the Bobby Fisher of drunk asss puking
It's almost summer. We need to start reconnecting with our home drug dealers.
Doing tuck and rolls down a stair case was not my brightest idea
I just ditched my friends to hang out with the chilis restaurant crew...one of these girls better have daddy issues
After 13 tally marks I wrote the number 4,000 and made u sign my arm to prove it.
First sunburned tits of the season. And it's only April... I feel like it's going to be a good summer.
I'm trying to get WebMD to diagnose me with a hangover
Thanks for coming over. I'm sorry everyone else was vomiting. Thank you for not vomiting. I love you.
You pretty much lost your mind. Your ego has gotten ten time the size of your balls.
He was so drunk we almost didn't even make it to his place because he didn't know where he lived
Just told my roommate about "analvice" and she is horrified and the Sound of Music is ruined.
You were cussing me out in sign language, and slurring your signs.
That's some kind of record drunk there...
Randomize