if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
Can we fast forward to the part where we get gyros
Thanks for telling my landlord that the poop stain was yours and not my secret dog.
Don't let the fact that shes seen my penis discourage you
He just showed up at my house and was like "have you seen an axe laying around?" he wasnt wearing any shoes.
Who the fuck did i sell my right shoe to last night i need to get that back im not walking with one shoe on
Nothing is better than seeing someone you fucked go to the Olympics. I feel so American.
I dreamt of sea otters and your boobs. My two favorite things.
Since the world is still here you can go ahead and disregard those pictures I sent
I. recorded a message of me yelling at myself to "get up out of that bed" and set it an alarm. REALLY loud
I love the fact that my Mom has been present at 90% of my drug deals.
Car is still out of commission. Looks like it's Grape Nuts and scotch for dinner.
Finding out you're not a mother on Mother's Day >>>
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Randomize
