you'll never believe how fucking awesome rain man is when you're stoned.
You hooked up with 4 random girls, avoided your grilfriend finding out about it, and dodged traffic on Park Ave. Can you say luck of the Irish?
Is it bad that I just used Smirnoff as mouthwash?
Hey its the Filipino guy from last night. I just wanted to say sorry my friend bled all over your driveway. Great party though.
please come over and have sex with me so we can talk about prom and kill 2 birds with one condom
It's really sad that I'm trying to calculate in my head the type of place to have dinner that's worth anal
Whos eating a bunch of acid and watching fireworks tomorrow? This guy. Thats who.
Although I would ideally cut back on smoking weed, imagine what getting high and looking for our spirit animals would be like
I've learned life lessons in Vegas. Mostly, drugs are cheaper than alcohol.
She forgot a bra so she just used seran wrap. The scary thing is, it worked.
What is the acceptable way to offer a trade of sex for a few hours of body heat?
Alcohol and IMDB don't always mix with 100% accuracy
I call bullshit
Call it what ever you want I just need to figure out how to get permanent marker off my cock
my mom asked me why i was covered in scratches, blood, and dirt this morning..i answered "i was planking obviously" and walked away
Or is it distressingly heterosexual?
Randomize
