I'm in your bed right now
Okay meet you there give me 10
Don't think you can make me leave either
Give me ten I ha e to be ******'s wingman I want you
You're the only person with a favorite bar in Disneyworld
I am 90% sure the kid in front of me in class is picking his face spots, smelling it, and then eating it. That is a LOT of % sure for something like that.
Dude I still wanna know who I had sex with on new years eve
Dont judge me. He may have been ugly but he was INCREDIBLE. He's like the Susan Boyle of sex.
He would stand there for a few seconds with a blank look on his face then randomly start running full sprint towards macdonalds. We'd catch him and he'd promise to stop so we'd let him go and he'd do it again.
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
Just because I tried to backhand you with a fist full of cash does not make me violent
you can't tell me it's over and send me pics of you and your cat?
Guess who just rode home in a cop car?! Your Fav flamingo
And now I'm drinking leftover wine in the grad lounge because fuck my life
In 2009 his now husband dressed in a sailor onesie and heels for pride so he needs to REMEMBER how to party
I just moonwalked my socks off. THAT LAZY. THAT HIGH.
I like that you're more concerned about how I would find the time to clone you, than the fact that I have your blood.
Although the guy I'm messing around with just offered to let me be his rich brother's sugar baby
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