I'm so drunk that I ordered a root beer at the bar. Whoops?
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
so the time management class we had to take for work seems to be working. I just beat off instead of waiting for gf to get home bc it fit my schedule better.
bring money and cleavage
Just watched porn on a 60 inch plasma screen TV... So that's where the clitoris is
I like that we make it a requirement to howl at the moon every time we get drunk together.
he made a bald eagle out of coke lines
Is eating fries while lying on the floor bad for you?
If I choke and die at least I will have been doing something I love
Also I'm eating leftovers with a pair of bullet removal forceps (unused) because I don't have a fork.
For the first time in my 26 years of life, I'm washing jizz out of my ponytail.... High five yourself later.
When someone's woman crush wednesday is an ultrasound of her unborn daughter...
I can't
Just had my butthole waxed. If that changes your plans for Saturday..
Does going to a local bar count as taking part in Small Business Saturday? Asking for a friend
You’re like one of those doomsday preppers, but for your vagina
If there's someone that knows accidental pantlessness, it's Mike.
Randomize
