I'm half single.
Please tell me it's the bottom half.
I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
There are 9 condoms on my bed either i met the greatest girl ever last night or something horrible has happened.
Funny favor to ask you... can you ask James to ask Chris if he came in me ? Trying to assess whether or not I need plan B.
He is offering to pay me back by sending me a dick pic.
.......................................
My thoughts exactly.
no seriously, she's legit pissed i'm late to lunch because i was watching full house. there's obviously no future here.
I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
i just remembered i chipped my tooth last night when i pulled up your pants zipper with my teeth
This dude has my number from April last year. Drunk me left sober me a puzzle. No confirmation of pants off business
I was passed out in a bathroom stall. Of course im going to look like shit
doing squats while I brush my teeth.. gotta keep the booty in check
I'm discussing Magic Mike with my mom and totally get why she thinks I'm gay.
So I fucked a guy with his mouth wired shut last night never thought id cross that off my imaginary bucket list
we're having rib night followed by a cultural enlightenment party
whats a cultural enlightenment party
we eat nachos and drink margaritas and tequila till we pass out
Word. I want it involving like... sing-a-longs and sniffing glue.
Randomize
