I've never had a man I enjoyed more than steak
I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
Anderson Cooper interviews Obama. It's like CNN is teasing and broadcasting my dream 3 way.
Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
I would say a second date is not looking likely, I acciedentally bit his penis. it's still bleeding 43 minutes later.
what the fuck a piece of candy corn just came out of her nose
I'm pretty sure I did the Macarena with a gay guy while shot gunning a beer
I mean, with your nipple problem im surprised. #hangacoatonem
It wasn't even dirty talking, it was more like the soothing gentle nonsense noises you make when you've spooked a horse.
He said he looked out his window and I was sitting in the grass with blood everywhere talking to a dog.
You can't say "my boobs are wonderful" and not expect my drunken subconscious to focus on wanting to see them. Btw-can I see them?
You got your ass kicked outside KFC on Tuesday
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
I had to give myself a suppository. That was the LEAST fun I've had inserting things in my ass.
Randomize
