You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
I'm going to leave the fate of whether I go to my midterms up to my dealer hitting me up or not
Currently microwaving whipped cream to make white Russians and hotboxing the kitchen while this random kid is dancing in the corner.
I walked down to the adult beverage store and got two bottles of jim beam and s shooter of crwon black label because we didn't have any Tylenol
Fuck that must be a crazy sunburn.
It was ths the worst 15 minutes of my life. . . It was like fucking a warm stick of butter.
It's like a challenge who can be the biggest embarrassment to the family. I win 80% of the time.
Is "sorry I booted you out mid-fuck last night" a good icebreaker?
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
I suggest absurd amounts of masturbation this weekend to build up the necessary calluses
In the pie chart of my life, she is a huge part of why I drink.
I don't think you should say "suck my dick" and then proclaim to be a messiah, of any sort.
Maybe i don’t have a tell. Maybe wine is my poker face.
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
Somebody broke the sliding door, and someone ripped the toilet seat off the toilet. So yeah, pretty typical friday night
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