so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
Its already bleeding so dont be alarmed after you bite it
Girl in front of me has spent the class alternating between playing farmville and the tiffany's website looking at engagement rings. Every once in a while she holds her hand up to the screen.
She doesn't deserve the breathe the same air that we do.
She just bought a cow and we've moved on to looking at wedding dresses.
I know I said I wouldn't, but he told me I looked like Mila Kunis. Reasons not to fuck him, go.
Think worst case scenario and then dress sluttier
The bosnian sent me a sext with his dick next to a comcast remote. It went up to the "stop" button. Ironic and appropriate. Grab your remote and imagine it.
You've ruined television for me.
I think I just wrote a poem about your penis but it was totally unintentional.
Crap I still need to get you a wedding gift. I'm just gonna give you a bag full of cash, lube, and condoms. And I'll use furry handcuffs instead of ribbon to tie the gift bag handles together.
Well, most of my extended family doesnt know about my love for the penis, so they dont have a reason to disown me
Please send me a thumbs up pic afterwards. No homo. After you've redressed and are heading for the walk of shame out of course
I can't handle dick pics with conversational captions
But I got head on a boat yesterday which was sweet until a bald eagle flew over. Then it became life affirming.
He took a girl home at like eight, fucked her, kicked her out, came back to the bar, and repeated the process again at 10:30 and 2:30. THREE GIRLS IN ONE NIGHT. ALL PICKUPS. I HATE HIM.
Anytime he goes down on me i automatically think of you cheering me on. Your a good friend.
Kid walks in and orders 24 Mcdoubles and 14 large fries, as he's handing me the money he tells me he lost at rock paper scissors so he had to do the munchie run.
Randomize
