Everyone just saw your hickey on TV and on the jumbotron at the hockey game.
Thanks dad.
Is it weird i consider You Sexy Thing our song?
I promise you 4 toothbrushes taped together and lube does not do the trick
doesn't matter. i just recorded the power rangers theme song on my phone. and its loud. was thinking we could use it as our entrance song as we walk into bars.
He said he has something to give me... I swear to God if it's a joint or a framed picture of his penis i'm going to kill him
In your defense, I really thought capturing that alligator would have been a lot more awesome and a lot less tragic.
RIP Mr Bojangles.
It would have been the trifecta of dick for her.
You thought your socks were broken. They were just inside out.
Hide in the closet. if you hear me yell patato salad come out swinging.
I woke up in a toga after going to a Hawaiian party. I don't even know.
Saw a girl outside my apartment shotgun a bud light, then a red bull, get in her Tahoe, and drive 4 people away. Gotta love thirsty Thursday.
If a treadmill opens up I'll run next to him and then fall off so he has to give me mouth to mouth
I'm the kind of gay who carries his anxiety medication in case the club scene gets too fierce
They were so sore! Either I have bed bugs or you were biting my nipples last night and don't lie to me.
My dad is clearly baked off his ass. He almost sat on moms cat in front of her, zoned out while staring at it and said he wondered what it was thinking about. Now he's dragging everything from the livingroom into the garage. Moms not happy.
Randomize
