Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
FYI-Owning a kitty significantly lowers your chances of ever seeing mine...
I think my favourite thing about cubicles is the fact that I can pick my nose at work
Just saw a white stretch Hummer limo outside of CiCi's pizza. Way to live up to the stereotypes, Alabama.
Pro tip: Don't start playing Bejeweled on Facebook while waiting for your Adderall to kick in. Unless you have the next 9 hours free.
I just ate a fried snickers. I now officially accept all fat jokes
Just got my period. This just makes my beach escapade totally even that much more ok.
so not only am i rooming with two chicks on the volleyball team, but we just put down the deposit on a hot tub. this is going to be the best summer ever for my dick.
She keeps telling me I can't keep feeding the dog my food. I gave half the weed brownie to the dog and half to me. I just want it to taste the greatness of cheezits like I am.
Hes trying to fuck me on a bear rug. Not saying no.
You can not love someone based on who they were when they were 9. Does he know how many dicks I've sucked since then?
Took pain meds with RumChata this morning. It's like morning milk but better
Is Oprah even human
We damn well better have a snow day tomorrow. We just broke out the rum.
Jesus better clutch that motherfucking wheel, then.
I'M NOT PUTTING MY TRUST IN JESUS! I'M PUTTING MY TRUST IN YOU!
Randomize