About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
So, when I got arrested, they fingerprinted me. I'm getting my nails done right now and I'm pretty sure he's filing off my prints. Worth the $30.
My whole sorority girl exterior is just a lie. I'm a fat tumblr girl on the inside.
unless you have a dick and you were thinking of chopping that off
It's cuz all she eats is salt lick, human souls, and fast food
Just broke my no shot rule again.. Made out with a stranger. That's 0 for 3 this month for the record
I'm definitely not going to be able to fuck him high. I won't be able to not laugh at his man boobs
I won the 'drunkest person at a family event' award tonight.
He went down on me for an hour and a half. He needs to get promoted more often.
Can you come unlock the door? I just peed myself on the porch.
She was drunk, dancing on the table. Until the table leg completely broke off and she fell on the ground and broke her front tooth straight off. Worse news is there making her pay for the table
Who is this? I have a text from you last night telling me your name and to train hard for Tuesday, please make this make sense
Like, my vagina is jet-lagged.
Do you think it would be weird to wear a shirt that says 'big fun small package' from an ex for a first date?
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