he showed up at my house with a hand-stiched sweater that said "girlfriend?"
You were playing beer pong by yourself. Finally someone took the ball and threw it into the bonfire. You sat by it, cried, and contemplated how to get it out. For 45 minutes.
New drinking game: take a shot everytime Jay-Z is played during the NFL draft.
tolerance is too high. going on a liquor strike. ghandi style.
Drinking wine out of an empty soup can and watching spongebob squarepants.. I eveb hate myself
Either way you look at it, I'm a slut. But either way I look at it, I'm having a fucking blast.
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
Well, let me tell you, it was the most vivid sex dream I've ever had. More so than the Paris Hilton one I had in 05. And about as weird.
Just a heads up, the coffee pot is filled with Jager.
Im at that shitty point in my day where I start planning night activities while finger dipping vyvance off of my desk, you got any plans?
Buying a pregnancy test at Walmart in the middle of the night in the middle of Tennessee is not really how I imagined my 25th year on this planet starting out...
this is the first time i'm angry at someone with so much boobs. she like managed to break my glass and my phone with one glorious swing
Well she got high, deleted the essay she was working on, and then ordered dominos. We all manage stress in different ways.
Balls deep in an Orange is the New Black marathon. Bring food and drugs.
Can we do lunch at 3? I have a blowjob scheduled for 2.
You schedule blowjobs?
Randomize
