When she said "surprise me" I'm positive she didn't mean "bang my roommate"
Prob not but she was surprised
i can juggle bunnies
cool
on fire
Just woke up. First thing I see: Little brother eating last night's jello shots thinking they're reg jello.
He said he got a lot of action last night. I asked how much? And he said he got to see down her shirt. Freshmen never cease to amaze me.
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
the thought 'we cant do it, we're in a public place' crossed my mind, and then I realized he's succeeding if he's trying to domesticate me.
elevator sex. pronto.
The only thing that made me get out of bed this morning was knowing that tonight, I don't plan on remembering what happened today
There's a questionable stain on Harley's bed...would they have sex on a dog bed?
Me and him were fist fighting in the back of the cab and I offered the driver a 100% tip to call him an asshole. I don't know why.
She invited me to Bikini Yoga with her friends. Sounds promising.
We were having sex in the gardens when the grounds keeper walked up on us. He gave me a thumbs up and walked away
I think you are severely overestimating being able to get your lingerie back by posting the lyrics of Irreplaceable
Someone who makes you cum so hard that you have an asthma attack is clearly your soulmate
I pour the whiskey from now on
you bleached my bangs. i have an interview later today and you assholes bleached my bangs.
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