Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
we should wear snuggies to the strip club
The lawn was on fire, but I fixed it.
Can you check your dirty laundry bag for my tooth.
I have no idea what happened after 2 AM. I woke up on my bike, in my bed, with a deep thigh bruise.
If a video of someone that looks like me banging that chick on the hood of her car in some parking lot suddenly shows up on the web... let me know, I gotta see how that turned out.
I was standing when I hit it. I barely made it to the couch before the walls started turning into people.
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
whose parrot is this?
come home. i made deep-fried hotdogs; don't let me die alone.
Not remembering where I left my grinder before vacation #stonerproblems
Oh you know, the usual. We had a good date, I took her back home, she took off my pants, laughed, and left.
I'll like his pictures on Instagram every once and a while so that when he sees my name he is reminded of the best blow job he's ever gotten.
You kept yelling stranger danger at Nick because he was talking to that girl you didn't like. Your not invited ever again.
Like every two minutes he would pull out and whipser "don't you do it, you bastard" while looking at his penis. His new name in my phone is 'penis whisperer'
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