i got kicked out of Barns and Nobles cuz i put all the bibles in the fiction section
I love the moment a guy admits defeat against the front clasping bra.
Dudes got a Polo tattoo. I don't care if he has a yacht I can't handle that level of gay.
he thinks im joking when i say don't visit. i mean it's summer...he was the college fuck and now it's time for the summer fuck
then you put baby powder on the bottom of your feet and walked to your room so "ladies would follow the footprints"
Breaking personal boundaries is my trademark
So my birthday was awesome. Only remember 45 min of it but I woke up with a girl on the couch and a half bowl of ground beef
she's like the billy mays of hookups...touch my boobs and i'll throw in this blow job ABSOLUTELY FREE
A nice make out session never hurt anyone. Plus he's a pilot, so he'll know the safety procedures for when the night crashes and burns.
Just the amount of girls he locked himself in my room woth says your gonna have to take a cab bro. I don't think he's going anywhere
So besides your brother walking in on you shaving and singing "I'm gonna get asssss" how was your night
She answered the door wearing a basket, said it was the only clean thing she had.
I wanna get high and watch Shrek tonight...don't make me do it alone.
tinder day one and i already had more guys message me about "the girl with the big tits in my second picture" than about me. MY 17 YEAR OLD SISTER CAN GET LAID WITHOUT EVEN HAVING TO MAKING A PROFILE
to be fair she does have a great rack
I literally heard an 'oh my god' when the shirtless Tongan appeared.
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