I totes stole your whore crown.
With great power comes great responsibility.
Whatever is fine with me, as long as I am dressed in green and end up shitfaced.
I have to have sex with him again. I feel like I need to train him so no other girl experiences that bad of sex.
We've done the math and the dogs tails are wagging at a rate of 3000 wags per hour. Stoned.
Look dude I'm sorry I used your bong to snorkel in my bathtub last night
And dont tell me its his job to cockblock me just because he's my boyfriend.
Like there's an 87% chance I'll end up on the bedroom floor demanding sex while freestyling in your face. I'm going to buy rum.
Did u know it's unconstitutional to turn down a shot during 4th of July celebrations.. Rest now dear liver
Pedi-lyte stocked
Oh, that was the alley that I ate a pine cone in.
He carried you out but the best part is you kept saying "can't I keep dancing" as you were gushing blood
I just wrote my resume on the same park bench I got felt up at in freshman year of highschool... I've truly come full circle
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
DUDE!!!!! THERE IS A MIDGET HANDING OUT RICE KRISPIE TREATS!!!!!! WHERE ARE YOU WHEN THE COOL SHIT GOES DOWN???????
Well when you come back we can have a huge bitch fit...or get really drunk....whichever comes first
my dad just built a flame thrower.. you should probably get here
Randomize