so explain again why im purple
no
it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
All I seem to do lately is get myself off, take naked pictures and drink beer. I don't know if thats a good or bad thing.
that shit musta been laced I laughed for two hours and everyone looked like penguins
I just want to go some place where I can have a nice night. Grind on men who speak no English, make out with a girl, and not feel judged.
I swallowed for you. Answer the phone.
I vaguely remember having a cowboy explain his belt buckle to me in the bathroom hallway
I have major gossip for you.
Oh no, did you have sex last night?
If I had sex last night I'd probably post it on facebook. It's been that long and I'd be that excited.
Nothing kills the mood like him going to slap my ass and he hits his balls at the same time
Saw two pregnant women at court today and I SWEAR one of them said "we had a threesome with this random guy and he got both of us pregnant."
Funny you say that, I just sold my stripper pole to my mom tonight...
I'm currently drunk proofing my room
I think he is using me to sort through his relationship issues, past and present. I did not sign up for this. All I want is booty. Am I the dude in this relationship?
He thought reverse cowgirl meant he dressed up as a cowgirl. Honestly, it was more creepy than funny
Randomize
