I didn't mind getting the stomach flu from him. we had great sex AND I'm seven pounds lighter
She was about to go down when you guys iced me. Thanks bro
He didn't seem too mad about the puke on the side of his car. You still have a chance.
Walked by a shop giving away free donuts this morning. Best walk of shame ever
I always enjoy the bewildered gaze as I buy chips, salsa and beer @ 0745.
No, you don't understand. If the words "stop," "alcohol poisoning," and "regret" aren't in the same sentence by the end of the night, I will have failed this birthday.
Need. Hospital. Physically am floating.
So coach him. No guy wants to admit being unsure of something in bed. It's a man-law or something.
If I could sit on this toilet forever I would totally do that right now
Negotiating with my body. We're ok. Violent upheaval is not necessary.
If the ex isent in town and im crying under a table somewhere because of it can we go to a drag show or something
He compared my vagina to his favorite T-shirt. I don't know if I should take that as a compliment or not..
i keep replaying things i did last night. and remembering new things. and its a constant cycle of torture
Is this really the life I've chosen for myself?
How's everyone else's ass tattoo today?
Randomize
