I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
If this place produced love children they would be born wearing Lilly Pullitzer with raging coke addictions.
highlight from tonight: i hit on her and her mother.
yea i guess its safe to say fire extinguishers are not synonymous with whip cream cans
his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
We ended up getting arrested after we flagged down the cops for a ride home with open beers in our hands... turns out the "nobody told me" excuse doesn't cut it anymore
I was really excited when he said that condoms didn't fit him, then he added "they fall right off"...
I am going to borrow your water/shock proof video camera for St. Pattys day so that if wake up next to the highway again I know why.
Ok but I hold the right to any footage of you getting slapped, puking, anything with body shots, and allowed to make a montage of it to put on youtube.
Want to get high and go thrifting? I'm trying to succeed making my dorm look like a deranged Applebees.
You are one of my favorite baseball you have fun today
I kinda feel like I was hit by a Prius. Just glad it's not bus status.
I just saw a stripper light her nipples on fire. Im terrified and impressed all at the same time
I'm going to book club and then I'm going to get laid. Being in your 20s ain't so bad sometimes.
Wait, how many people just saw my dick?
Randomize
