Just saw a policeman use his lights to go through a red light only to turn them off and go to Sonic...
Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
he was shitfaced drunk and couldn't walk but could still recite the top 10 in order from the first season of american idol. impressive
Like reprimanding the wall for "sneaking up on me" drunk
You have to come over we all bought drinking hats. Mine has a turtle on it. Side note: somehow someone got their hands on 50 candied apples and we need to eat them...
I don't feel bad about fucking old guys. That's what I want. It's what I likeeeeee.
Im pretty sure that girl just said "Im taking you home even if your girlfriend has to come too." Why are we here again?
I don't even know man. I was to busy having beer showered on me and grabbing some balls
I don't want a mention or even a whisper of a Shakespeare Festival by that or any other name including, but not limited to, a fucking Renaissance Fair. Are we clear? It will be a DEALBREAKER .
it's too much effort for something that isn't food.
I feel like I just did it with Buster from Arrested Development. Taking a shower. #winefail
He's over here like "remember those pics you sent me a couple years ago? Those were hot." And I'm like "remember talking about what we were gonna name our kids a couple months ago? That was hot." Therein lies the disconnect
Why is it pressure? I want to see your cute face and possibly sit on it. You make it like its a bad thing.
I texted him back and I am so nervous I may vomit up all of the soup I just ate.
Unexpected pro of the hostel though: literally down the street from Coors Field. I could literally fart on the building in five minutes.
Randomize
