please tell me I'm in your upstairs bedroom. Just google mapped myself and I have no idea where I am.
you called to congratulate me on being the reason you lost never have i ever
only 75% of american men are circumcised...i guess this was bound to happen to me someday.
I woke up at 2 pm to my roommate checking my pulse.
you are getting stockholm syndrome from your pubes
There are paw prints all over my ceiling.
I seriously just found a rose petal in my vagina.
We just for robbed for the second time. I believe the only thing I have left to my name is my $75 dildo
She gave me a foot massage while her friend rode me. Your gf puked into the oscolating fan. How were our nites alike?
He has a shower chair now. So he sits and watches me shower. It's kind of creepy.
My neighbor Chris is here. I am warning you, he is wearing a kilt I just saw his balls. Be incredibly careful that you don't see what I did.
Somehow he made it really romantic
He came on your tits... That doesn't scream romance to me.
It's not even 11, i dropped a shot glass, nick is bleeding, and everyone is drunk
Today is my 3 year wedding anniversary...and I've seen three different dicks.
I picked up a towel, and butt beads fell out of it.
Oh yeah... Surprise!
Randomize
