Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
He wants to be 'in an open relationship'. Fuck that. That's the online equivalent of letting him pee in a circle around me.
also I just used a straw to drink the juice out of a tomato b/c I forgot how to bite.
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
i think if i got caught drinking at work i could get away with it if i started crying and saying my cat just died. as long as i'm confident.
She trust falled out of a window. It was like that scene from A Little Princess but with a lot more blood.
I would personally love to see the surveillance video of me throwing my stuff inside, peeing on the sidewalk, then crying hysterically when I realized I locked myself out. Again.
Swear to god our friendship has its limits. Stop peeing on the fucking refrigerator.
That's not a funny feeling. That's hepatitis. You got it from that bar where everything was sticky.
I'm drawing the line at your vagina. I will not accompany you to get that pierced and/or tattooed. There's got to be some mystery to our relationship.
We just got busted fucking in the hammock by his roommate...I'm so out of here as soon as hes asleep....
I just want a simple guy who likes cats, tattoos, and doing coke off my tits.
I tried to order dominos and couldn't but I accidentally placed an order for this morning. I knew I did it last night and was gonna call and cancel this morning but honestly it's coming in 30 minutes and I need it
The best part of being a lesbian? If I'm late for work at a hookup's place I can use her make up and peace out. Well and all the sex of course.
Randomize
