belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
Uhh me and Jacque peed on the street outside the bar last night and wiped with flowers. I vaguely remember her repeating the word "fresh" over and over.
I just creeped all your pictures on Facebook -- it was like I watched you grow up right before my eyes.
Since when does wearing a condom and going down on me make someone a gentlemen?
Whatever is fine with me, as long as I am dressed in green and end up shitfaced.
Disney World has no open container laws. Ohmygod this place is even cooler than it was when I was ten.
he literally had a slideshow of all the girls hes had sex with pictures set to american woman
I found it funny that her boobs actually kinda felt like a bag of sand. the 40 year old virgin should feel better about himself.
it's official, i've been high in 26 different states, and three different countries.
I started singing the national anthem on a train in London. Happy 4th of July assholes
Don't upload the drink o meter to your google calendar. Somehow binge drinking looks even worse with a time stamp.
I tried to get you a girl. They want us to cook breakfast though
Lolll I'll be sleeping
I'm practically buying you a 1 way ticket to pound town.
in other news i'm homewrecking via instagram
It's my birthday, if I want to stay home, get stoned and watch the gameshow network, that's what I'm going to do.
Fucker was flying a Bruins flag. He can pick up the dog's poop himself.
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