kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
Coming down off exstacy at a church event. Resisting the urge to dance to the church hymns.
In The Air Tonight was playing in the dentist's office. Had to stop the cleaner to do the drums.
And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
I just ate a cashew that looked EXACTLY like your dick.
It's 6 am and I've spent the last few hours searching for a cork screw or suitable substitute. You had none. Incidentally, I finally opened this bottle of wine, but owe you a new meat sticky thing with those two prongs. Sobriety is not good for me. Or your utensils.
Found her. Shes unconscious up against the room door. Her credit card is in the keycard slot
I'm not drinking anymore...and by that, I mean until St. Patrick's Day.
I really want to lead this Amish guy into temptation
I dunno if you guys are having weird sex or a most accurate bird sound contest but either way stop doin it
He wants to take me instead of his girlfriend to the happiest place on earth... By that He meant Vegas. My morals are just loose enough to think this is a good idea
She seriously left me for a guy that likes his own statuses on facebook.....
Look. When I let you cum on my tits don't fuck it all up by going "SKEET SKEET SKEET" it just pisses me off.
Pretty sure we're going to get a cease & desist notice from the Make A Wish Foundation, but until then...
...and now I welcome the sweet embrace of death.
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