i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
Mars, I'm going to name my child horatio mars. He will hate me till he gets high. Then he'll understand
It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
I cut you off after you tried to do a shot out of a neti pot, down your nose.
explains the nose bleeds.
Excused from finishing the term project because my lab partner got arrested. For the second year in a row. Public school, I love you.
it was really awkward..i thought he had two dicks, but later realized it was jsut his roommate
I can hear her blowing you man. All I hear is her saying 'yeah' over and over again.
It was just a reflex. BOOM I kicked her in the face
I guarantee that wasn't the first penis someone placed on her forehead.
You fucked her?! HER?!
She sent me a nudie pic with a bunch of weed nuggets all over her tits...what was I supposed to do? I don't hate America sir.
First memory of my senior year: Going into registration still drunk from last night.
Weird come down, just saw a woman on the train go to grab something and realised she had terrifying hands. They literally filled me with dread. I don't think I'm ok.
I just dominated some guy while wearing your moms thong
I've got 3 hot dudes surrounding me. It's the Bermudick Triangle.
When the bouncer wouldn't let you back in you screamed "Authority is not given you to deny the return of the king!" and ran past him.
Randomize
