Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
Too late. I'm going over there. I'm a bad example for all women: Do as I say, not who I do.
I'm sorry for coming into your work place and trying to smuggle you out in my purse.
when she first told me she hooked up with him my initial response was to shout "WE HAVE SOMETHING IN COMMON!"
Drag queen told me that I have the cheek bones to do drag. That's supposed to boost my moral.
Sorry I kept grabbing your vagina at the casino. I believed it was my lucky unicorn to win bonuses
But mostly fuck him senseless. Render him speechless. Have him look at my vagina and wonder, "WHAT SORCERY IS THIS?!"
YES please come visit. Lets go get belligerent. I won't even pepperspray you
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
Apparently it's not a "bonding moment" when you realize you use the same porn site as your boyfriend
not sure when or how we ended up at this wedding party but you need to be here they are handing out screwdrivers and Yamakas to everyone and it's a got damn open bar you need to be here now
Knows all the good gay bars AND has a dog? Wtf can't I drop pizza on guys like that????
You could cut the tension with my nipples.
Only I could dislocate my ribcage coaching volleyball and still want to get drunk tonight.
I’m not lawful evil! I do evil things because I want to, not because of the law
Randomize
