I think someone spiked my drink last night. .. Like all 20 of them.
Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
so i just drove past a racoon and a kid on a long board... god i love 4am white castle runs
Day two of taking my adderall. I just organized the pantry and alphabetized my dvds. I've missed my mind on drugs
Well, I didn't bring a notebook or any paper to class. Should I take notes on the sugar packet, lace thong, or condom wrapper that instead are in my school bag?
i'll booty call him tonight after the radiohead concert, that way he can see his favorite band and his favorite vagina all in one night.
That sad moment when you flush your Molly down the toilet at the airport & watch your vacation slowly end..
He pulled over in the Compass Bank parking lot so I could dry-heave, but I decided I couldn't vomit there because "I bank here."
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
FINALLY GOT MY TENTH DICK. PARTY FOREVER
"I licked someones beard, because I can."
I HAVE TOO MICH DICK TALKING TO ME IDK WHAT TO DO.
Don’t fucking talk to that dude from monday!! Ethical consumption dude, don’t fuck shitty guys
Quit giving me a hard time, whens the last time you got head every night? Cougars are where its at they dont play games
You did an excessive amount of blow and then screamed "WHO THE FUCK NEEDS A LADDER?!" And then Mario style wall-jumped onto the roof. It was one of the most impressive things I've ever seen.
Randomize
