I dont shave on purpose to keep myself from being slutastic!! it usually works
His idea of a romantic evening was shotgunning Keystones. What a keeper.
so i woke up this morning covered in mail. none of it is mine.
The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"
they came at us with fireworks while we were skinny dipping in her jacuzzi at 4 am...
just chugged some gatorade and threw it up. todays gonna be awesome
He fell off a seesaw, tore half his ear off and somehow convinced the paramedic he was allowed to have a beer while being treated
You don't have anything to lose--we've established that he's not going to murder you and he smells good.
I just got a call from the front desk apparently one of my feiends was dropped off by a handicap bus passed out in a wheel chair unlv is goig down
he went to the bathroom at 5am only to come back and squeeze my boob before going back to sleep
LETS THROW SHIT OFF THE PORCH
I even put my vibrators back in the bedroom instead of the coffee table. If that's not growing up then I don't know what is.
Do you ever have one of those days when your breasts are just fucking awesome?
Drunk me also decided it would be funny to change all the passwords on my computer last night. Now I can't log into anything.
You have a penis. Therefore everything you say is automatically wrong.
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