Maybe if i steal enough bar glasses i can justify all the money spent i've spent there
not sure how we got back down, broken rib says we didn't use stairs
We got kicked out after you decided to chase your shot using the soda gun behind the bar.
Hey.. there are 2 people i've never met before spooning in the bathtub. Please elaborate on what went down last night.
I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment
yo btw licking skeptical coke off table right now
Ya he's the booze devil, like if the black hole and Bermuda triangle joined forces with Captain Morgan
How do you say happy birthday to someone you fuck occasionally that almost got you arrested? Like what do I text.
Don't be alarmed when we finally get naked and I let out a WOOHOO!!!
I've had sex near too many of the blankets to let our parents touch them like this
I don't just want drugs. I deserve drugs.
I already plan to donate my brain to science so they can attempt to fully understand the complexities of my existence
Sometimes I get confused on who I really actually know and who's lives I just know everything about via internet. Its a fine line
Ummm so he didn't think I was serious about breaking up... Most awkward conversation ever
Can I borrow a thong? I’m having drinks with a cute boy tonight and I’m out of clean underwear
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