God help me. Come pick me up. The guy told me this is not a hotel and i had to leave.
barbara walters just said penis...
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
Thats my favorite, when ex girlfriends become XL ex girlfriends
She just looked down there and said "i breed horses. this is better than anything ive ever seen."
You threw up? Were you ladylike while you did it? I'm wagering that you were. Like a Disney princess. Like a "Puke Me Pretty" Barbie.
i got up, ate a McDouble, then went straight back to bed.
You sure know how to make a day worth living.
But how will the next generation learn about life choices without a Jersery Shore?
His favorite stripper is going to jail. He's taking it pretty hard
...its technically supposed to be for the bridal shower but I think I can find an ensemble that says "im hopped up on x. Stick your tongue down my throat." As well as " im supporting your marriage to my brother"
I have a vagina. So i automatically win.
some kid just came up 2 me bleeding yelling "thats how u riot"
stop texting me about your public sex.
says she who narrated getting eaten out in a movie theatre over text to me
Just puked most of my soul out..
I just woke up with a cowboy hat on my face and a playboy from the 90s on my chest
Randomize