i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
cannot fit in my clothes. too depressed to drink.
if you drink enough to puke, it's like a weight loss plan.
i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
just saw a DUI checkpoint outside of a taco bell...i feel like thats cheating...
True Life: I puke at bars and try to catch it in my hand...then walk away like it didn't happen
It wasn't a wasted relationship. I got road-head in an Escalade. I still keep that with me.
you have a wonderful penis attached to someone I'm having a lot of problems with right now
I think they're German
Just say lederhosen and see what happens
Never backflip into an above ground pool. I think the gash will be smaller by Monday though.
I really don't think there's anything more liberating than farting.in a loud bar where no one.can.hear you
So I just realized I have three bananas, seven condoms, three lube packets, three tampons, and a shot glass in my bag but no pen #modelstudent
The party was Hollywood themed and I won an oscar for "finest ass in a leading role"
She was a little thick, but we banged on the beach and fireworks went off as we finished so I think God wanted it
I woke up to the smell of shame and vomit in my hair... went to the bathroom to shower and passed out... woke back up naked with the blow dryer on... thanks for making my birthday a success
My Boss was giving porn recommendations. I think I'm scarred for life.
Randomize
