yeah, i liked him til i heard he had a sac that could apparently smother my face.
Well for one thing, she was eating rice with a shot glass.
you refused to leave the drive-thru at mcdonalds until the cashier took a jello shot
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
She stared for a good 10 seconds before calling my dick "awe-inspiring", and then proceded to give me blueballs. All in all the ego boost made my night break even
I don't know what I should tell you tell you. I don't want to encourage you to dye my dog.
she got into med school, i feel dumb for banging her dance major friend
Johns diaper came in the mail. He's freaking out thinking there's some conspiracy going on since he sharted on the drive home from st. Louis
Want to come over and play therapist and then fuck all the emotion away?
Then he claimed me as his prize for 3rd place in a wing eating contest. Too romantic.
Visibly drunk girl eating alone at a souplantation just spilled salad all over her body. It was me
I walked in and found you petting your fish outside the bowl, you said its fine, you do this all the Time.
Look, I've got a really big car. We just need to put ourselves in it and put some body parts in other body parts.
sitting in the prison waiting room in my boyfriends clothes. looooong story.
Party bus got out of hand. Some guy pissed himself. Later, he couldn't find his house keys, so he kicked the back door in.
Randomize
