After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
im in Michaels with rachel and i see a little boy jumping around and waving a rainbow pompom. Welcome to our team little one
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
I just puked on my dog.I feel summer coming on
Idk. I woke up marinating in beer on my beanbag. Idk what you mightve done.
let's be real here, you have a beautiful vagina. this kid is a doctors son. that's a remedy for beautiful rich grandkids. he is just trying water his family tree, and make sure he doesn't end up in some piece of shit adult home. go for it.
So a sorority girl just introduced herself to me by saying "a guy I used to fuck just threw up on me" and then she grinded on me
Just got caught staring at a woman breast feeding. My only response was, "She's so adorable".
I'm honestly considering asking her if I can eat her out, as a friend.
We were in his kitchen and she turned to me with a straight face and an avocado in her hand and said "Can we steal this?"
I just went through the Wendy's drive thru only wearing a towel. My life has hit an all time low
You're the best friend ever. I wouldn't want to do the walk of shame with anyone else.
I just opened a beer with a child's toy at a 5 year olds birthday....can you look up the next AA meeting?!!
Is that strawberry winking at me??
He said it was the classiest hand job he ever had because my nails were painted red. We need to go to nicer bars from now on.
Randomize