just took a shot of grandma at the fucking bowling alley... this is going to be interesting
is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
Bring mistletoe to the strip club, and they feel obligated. they dont even charge you
I wish there was a non slutty way to ask the guys across the hall if i can copy their men's bathroom key so I have one for my one night stands
He put used condom on the handle of the plunger in the bathroom.
marshmallow pipe was a success. so was melon pipe. come try it
What the fuck could you be doing in that room to make her yell "Beginners Luck!" over and over again?
He hasn't responded, but he probably just jizzed in his shorts again, so I'll give him time.
We are going to need a water proof camera with a flash....exit routes....lots of booze.....and a tutu for good measure
sorry for laughing and taking pictures while you were having an asthma attack on st. patricks day
Had to immediately delete the Bevmo email because I can't even look at an email about alcohol right now.
Its was awkward last year cuz in the middle of it her mom bust In the room with noise makers and champagne
I just gave them my two week notice. Now is the perfect time to fuck my boss's son
before i went to bed i wrote myself a note that says 'i feel all swirly'
Why yes, I DID want cramps for Christmas, how did you know God?
Randomize
