I fucked **** last night, don't tell mike
this is mike. we're done.
you were calling yourself Ulickes S. Cunt.
i went to a real vip club. the bathroom attendant was wiping down counters after girls wearing gucci did lines of coke on them. where did MY life go wrong
It's sad because pictures are supposed to say a thousand words, and theirs just say 'fat'
Yeah I'm about to go down a waterslide that comes out a 2nd story window. I love college.
Great News, you CAN smoke bowls with a magnifying glass
Woke up with a chicken parm sandwich in my clutch. Aaaand I'm eating it.
I just had a 30 minute conversation about hummingbirds. That high.
I miss high conversations.
Swinging. Is. Amazing.
YOU ARE SO GOD DAMN LOUD AND YOU'RE SHAKING THE GOD DAMN HOUSE. FUCKING STOP.
jusy threw up in the airport bathroom. I am no longer thankful for fireball.
I lost my bra, he lost his virginity. Seems like a fair trade off.
The doctor basically called me a dirty dick.
i dunno dude, he took his shirt off and is rubbing jello shots on himself. i think he's done
I feel like i'm being yelled at when you type in all caps.Did you just have bad sex?
Am I the only person in the world that does not give a shit about the avengers?
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