Thats not how I planned it, its just the way she passed out
I have a hot bod, but my face sucks, what can i do?
i kinda do this "flirt with girls and pretend to be a hot white guy named chris" thing
My life would be so much easier if i could just ride around in the cash cab all day
dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
he thought he was parachuting out of a plane... talk about a bad trip.
we sixty- nined on a tennis court.. not even drunk. you say insane. i say creative genius.
After grabbing my boob for a couple minutes he then decides to ask me if I was awake.
I told the bartender that he could give me back the tip I gave him if he outsmarted me in a battle of wits. He has yet to challenge me.
No seriously stop! I feel bad for him. It isn't even big enough to make fun of. It's so small that it's like a disability.
No worries. On my way home to get ski poles and wipe the sick off my face. Then it's time to get drunk in the park
Our conversation concluded a weekly schedule of casual sex in between classes.
He literally just patted me on the vagina and said goodnight to it.
Well I hate to admit it but at this point I can successfully say i have been pee'd on by both of my roommates.
Yeah just had sex and grub hub came right after he did. I’d say it’s a win.
Randomize
