i dont care if i had to wear a dress to fuck her, she was super hot and i stand by my decision
...She just said, "We've been blessed with good drugs lately."
I already wrote the apology to my liver. He knows whats up
Whiskey shot with bacon bits, our version of Goldschlager WE ARE TRYIN IT.
I wonder what it's like for my roommate to live bicuriously thro my sex life
At least I can pee in a cup like a champ at this point
Only sluts go out in this weather carpe diem boys
What I do when I'm blackout drunk is none of my business.
CAN I WEAR ASSLESS CHAPS TO SUNDAY BRUNCH OF JUDGEMENT????
I am so sorry for drunk texting you r kelly lyrics
Come share oat with me in your robe
I think you are severely overestimating being able to get your lingerie back by posting the lyrics of Irreplaceable
Well you could have stayed home, played house and got blow jobs all weekend babe, but we all have to live with our decision
i mean ive seen your left buttcheek how much more bro can this get
Probably some sort of karmic revenge for me looking at titties somewhere along the way
and for that you shall suffer
God: I won't strike you down, but I shall introduce your child to Doja Cat during a quarantine
Randomize
